Don Bisdorf

Inexpert Tarot Reading: March 12

Categories: [blog]

We're starting to thaw out up here in the North, which means the snow is receding (yay!) but the dog's allergies are starting up again (boo!).

And today's cards are the Three and Seven of Pentacles.

Two tarot cards, depicting craftspeople working on a cathedral, and a farmer tending a crop of golden disks.

Ka-ching! It's all about the pentacles.

But these cards just give me more questions than answers. Take the Three of Pentacles. Sure, it's clear that we're seeing a common bane of an engineer's life. The two figures on the right side of the card are micromanaging the unfortunate laborer on the left. One of our two micromanagers is the customer: a monk, whose church this must be. And the other is holding a set of plans, which would suggest that they're the architect, except what are they wearing? I'm pretty sure that splotchy orange robe with the head-tail isn't a traditional medieval architect's outfit? Wait...maybe that person is the church mascot. You know, like sports teams have mascots. While the priest is giving the sermon, the mascot would be dancing around in their splotchy orange robe, encouraging cheers and throwing t-shirts into the pews. That's absolutely a thing that happened during medieval church services.

So, okay, and in our other card, the Seven of Pentacles, I'm not sure whether to ask how this farmer managed to grow solid gold disks, or why. Their family isn't going to be able to eat solid gold. Sure, maybe the farmer is planning to take them off to town and sell them to buy actual food, but that seems awfully risky. I have personally played several hours of Skyrim, and I can assure you that medieval peasant farmers don't employ heavy security forces to protect their fields. Unless that's the point. Maybe those gold-laden vines are a trap to lure in a nearby bandit crew or rampaging army. And maybe this farmer is no simple farmer, but a martial-arts prodigy, impersonating a farmer just to draw in the enemy and beat the snot out of them with that stick. It's like the Seven Samurai, except there's only one of them.

And the overall message is that selling colloidal silver as a medical remedy is a harmful scam.

Wow, glad we cleared that up! See you tomorrow!

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